When life throws you a curve ball!

Life has its ups and downs and it's at times when we feel that we are between a rock and a hard place that God shows us the way out.  This has happened in my life repeatedly as I have encountered situations where there has been animosity and negativity.  I am an avid reader of the Investors Business Daily column "IBD's 10 secrets to success."  The number one tenant is "How you think is everything: "Always be positive.  Think success, not failure.  Beware of a negative environment."  How you respond to this information is your choice however for me negativity is the first and foremost reason why I distance from people.  Dr. Wayne Dyer's quote explains how to create abundance in this way "Abundance is not something we acquire.  It is something we tune into."  In order to receive positive energy you have to avoid the negative.

In my personal life I have been dealing with a legal situation with the Kansas State Board of Nursing and for this reason I have not been working in a regular capacity.  Staying with a friend who is as Democrat as I am a staunch conservative has been conflictual.   Republicans believe in the sanctity of life and limited government.  As Jefferson said - the larger the government the smaller our liberties become.  With the elections coming up I believe that my friend is allowing her controlling nature to stop me from voting in the upcoming elections for which I registered but was never given my voting card that in all probability came in the mail.  I have been yelled at!; "forgotten" to be picked up from the library in the late afternoon; told frequently that money is a household issue; certain items that have been purchased in the past are no longer on the grocery list i.e. tea.  A month of house sitting has been my only break although I have applied for various non-nursing jobs none have materialized. 

My work as a Life Coach is the most pleasing to me and I look forward to making more on line relationships so that I can expand my business and for that I have need a web site.  My friend agreed to drive me to a suburb of KC to the home of a couple who belong to Science of Spirituality.  I have travelled with them to visit our Spiritual Master in Chicago.  They are an Indian family who work in the IT industry and have a beautiful home and children.  The lady had left my friend a message inviting her to a program as my friend had been initiated by our Master in Sound and Light Meditation.  My friend played the voice mail tape saying that she and her husband couldn't understand a word that was said!  Because most of my communication with the public is done via the web I had wanted to use my video camera and headphones more and planned on taking them with me.  I have few things in my room where I stay in my friend's home and had kept a small cotton tote with my audio and video equipment inside a larger cardboard box.  When I left the house on Friday  tomorning the bag was inside the box.  On Saturday morning the tote and equipment was nowhere in sight.  I checked through the bag with laundry and another bag of clothes and even inside a suitcase.  Nothing!!  My friend who was sitting in the front room of her home when I told her about the missing equipment told me that my cat had pulled the door open on Friday morning and had gone out into the house.  I said that it was a "supernatural" act as I had a suitcase full of clothes in addition to a wooded magazine rack on the mat which I slid from under the door to securely close and prevent her from opening it.  When my friend denied any knowledge of my misssing bag I said that I would have to report it missing to the police so that if anyone used the equipment on line it could be identified by its serial number.  She reluctantly gave me the keys to the car as she said that she didn't want to go with me to my Indian friends.  When I returned she asked me with curiosity whether the bag was grey with a zipper to which I was able to positively affirm that it didn't matter about the equipment because my friends would gladly let me use theirs.  I was able to release the situation completely and whatever negativity was being created had been turned into a positive situation.

I stay in my room on Sunday's and could hear my friends voice which was loud and gregarious on the phone with a tone of triumph as she perhaps expected me to "discover" my mistake in putting my equipment in my laundry then announce to her that I was sorry.  No such thing took place!  And today I carried the equipment with me to the library and will keep it with me at all times just as I do with my lap top. 

There is another creepy thing that has happened several times - she came across a pair of my "skivvies" (underwear) around the house!  I have never had this kind of thing happen before and I have felt pressured even more to leave but with the job market like it is that hasn't happened.  Up until the past few nights her husband would announce loudly in the hallway that he was going to bed which was hard to ignore even with earplugs.  During the month I spent house sitting my friend made several announcements about their new bed and at one time I had an opportunity to tell her that I was a spiritual person and that I don't share my energy intimately with anyone.  They are controlling and have an agenda that they are not able to express openly because they are not able to deal with confrontation.  

I called my brother in England early this morning who has said that I could live with him.  Then I had a message on face book from a friend who sells a product that I love and wanted to know whether I was interested in developing the business with her.  Of course I am but I had been stuck because it takes money to make money.  I know that this is an answer to my prayer and that I will have somewhere to stay and make money and create the life that I want - one of financial abundance and a lifestyle that is centered on spirituality, health and fitness and being close enough to visit with my daughter and baby grandson once in a while.

I haven't been able to get away from the negativity until this point and now God has given me a chance to be in an area of health and wellness with a product that is absolutely the best and with a friend who is just about as positive as you can get!

If life throws you a curve ball just let it happen and keep focused on what you can do to rectify the situation.  I have found the most benefit from a regular practice of meditation that keeps me connected with Source and replenishes my soul.  "Ruin and recovery are both from within." ~ Epictetus - philosopher.  You will find the strength within to guide you through difficulties and by keeping your own state or vibrations positive you will attract the solution you need for your particular problem or circumstance. 

Sometimes we have to work through our karma and this concept can be viewed differently through the lens of various religions.  "Our deeds follow us, and what we have been makes us what we are."  ~  John Dykes, clergyman.  That is why spiritual masters tell us to watch our thoughts and actions because we will have to pay for them either in this life or the next.  Be mindful and limit your exposure to negative people.  I enjoyed a story about a goat that was about to be slaughtered when it suddenly laughed then cried.  The man with the ax asked the goat why he did this and the goat replied I laughed because this will be the 500th time that I have been beheaded.   The goat went on to say God had told him that 500 beheadings would cleanse him of his own karma of slaughtering that many goats when he was born as a man.   Then further explained, I cried because you will have to pay for the karma of beheading me. The man then told the goat that he was not going to cut his head off and would in fact protect him from being killed.  The goat said that it futile because of the law of karma, there was nothing they could do to change it.  The goat went to graze on the rocky slope of the hillside.  The goat was immediately struck by a sharp rock that cut off his head. I would like you to consider being vegetarian and looking to nature as part of our own being in God.  Someone shared on face book that the cheetah she was pictured with is dear to her and that she considers his company "Darshan," which in the East means being in the company of a saint.  We have the same consciousness with animals as we do our own soul and that is expressed as love. That unconditional love that we can so easily share with animals and that they give to us.
In conclusion the main focus of your mind and heart should be geared toward the positive.  That includes thoughts, people and any business that you wish to earn money through.  Keep your body as pure as you can through drinking pure spring water.  Although I have not purchased this product yet I recommend that you check http://www.kagenwaterdoctor.com/ and treat your body to the best and cheapest medicine - water!   Read scripture and meditate daily to connect with your soul and God.  Listen to your own inner voice and don't compromise what it right for you by conforming to what isn't.  Walk away from what is wrong and abusive and God will direct your path.  Christ said shake the dust from your feet and that is how you should be with anyone who disrespects you.

I am a Professional Life Coach and welcome your comments and feedback.  Please feel free to contact me for a free consulation at: lawrencerita511@gmail.com

Intrussiveness

We all have things that pluck our nerves!  Culturally as an English person keeping my voice tone low enough to keep my conversations private is something that comes naturally.  It disturbs me when I am in public and hear conversations that I would rather not.  Being made into an unwilling participant by others behaviors that I object to the most.  When challenged with intrusiveness I have to gauge my emotional reaction and try to refocus my thoughts onto something more constructive and positive.  For instance I will read on listen to a tape so that my focus in on what interests me and then the loud voice tones of people who don't seem to mind pouring all of their personal experiences out in a public forum seem to fade into the distance.

Keeping strong boundaries is important for your own good and for the good of those around you.  Etiquette is something that people seem to know less about these days now that cell phones for instance have become a normal way of communicating no matter where the person is when he/she answers.  In fact I have found myself in the rest room and being a reluctant participant in a loud conversation about everything that is important to the person on the phone. 

One of the things that you can do when calling someone is ask if it's a convenient time to call.  They don't have to necessarily tell you "no" because they are on the john, but at least you can know before laying out your agenda that the person would prefer you to call back in 5 minutes.  Keeping your conversations when meeting with someone as brief as possible is always a mark of common courtesy.  Recently I attended a meeting where I was a reluctant participant to a long and exhaustive demonstration  of how to make garbanzo beans into a puree.  The man obviously liked to be the center of attention and put great emphasis on points so small that I almost went to sleep standing up.  Where do people get their idea that they can have all your attention from?  Again I found that the level of voice tone was high and it emphasized his need to lecture everyone about how easy it was for him to show us how to be cool!

I remind myself that I haven't done the spiritual work so far to waste it by slipping on a banana skin so to speak.  What I do in these situations is realize that it's a test for me and I then repeat the mantra's that my Teacher has given.  So in these moments of frustration can be turned in to spiritual tuning and focusing on God's name.  Someone once told me that when people are problematic they are like angles that help us go deeper into our practices. 

There are several things that can be intrusive in life and perhaps the thing I don't like is loud voice tones and bad manners generally.  When people have difficulty expressing their emotions they can turn it into anger and when they are unable to deal with the anger it turn inward as depression.  Anyone who has been around a person who is depressed will note that their mood can be said to be at least cranky.  Recently a friend of mine who is depressed picked me up from the library and when I said that I had emailed a person she dramatically positioned her arm in an outstretched motion to introduce what I had done followed by an emphasis on AAANNNNDDDD!  I was aghast with shock!  Who did she think she was talking to and did she really know me?  I have not allowed people to abuse me and refuse to at this stage in my life.  When I responded by asking why she was angry she got even angrier and has since accused me of confronting her.  I believe the two examples I have used are actually narcissistic people who are so wrapped up in themselves they don't care about how troubling their outrageous intrusion is.

Distancing is a natural response for me when I need to get some space and that is what I have done with my friend whom I am staying with unfortunately.  I spend the day at the library where I can use wifi and then go back to her home after 6 pm.  There is very little time to spend with her before I shower at 8pm and go to bed at 9pm.  I recently responded to a t.v. program she was watching about Obama and his father by telling her that Ganish De Silva had written a book about his father when she said that Obama had seen his father only once in a very defensive manner.  I said that he might have only seen him once but had written a book about him.  With that she shouted about that wasn't all that I have said and that has meant that my conversations have been limited.  Who wants to talk with someone who is a loose cannon?

In all we all have to deal with people in our personal or work lives who intrude and lack manners.  In the work arena it is better to try to find ways of getting along with colleagues and if that doesn't work then you will have to face the problem through a superior.  These are growing experiences for all of us who would naturally rather avoid confrontation.  My first real experience with learning how to confront was when I worked with a nurse named Juanita who was very butch and had a moustache.  She was abrupt and bullying because she thought that way she could be boss.  My supervisor said that I would have to approach her at the beginning of the shift to check in with how she was feeling.  It wasn't long before Juanita slammed the door in my face.  I got through that and have been able to meet other challenges that haven't been quite that bad since.

Meditation is the one spiritual tool that helps me to unload all the negative feelings that can build up because of relationship issues.  By sitting in meditation everyday you allow yourself the natural healing power to dissolve emotions that tie up your own energy or power.  It is uplifting, doesn't cost a penny and will improve your emotional, mental and physical health.

My work is as a Life Coach and I will work with you on areas in your life that you want to manage and improve.  You can achieve your goals no matter how far they seem from reality for you.  You can do it!
Contact me at lawrencerita511@gmail.com